My “WHY”

The other day my mother-in-law asked me, “Why do you share and tell everyone so much about you.” as she shook her head and gave me a look of bewilderment. I can understand her perspective. Coming from a generation where sharing your feelings, talking about your struggles and showing any form of weakness was frowned upon. How can I expect her to understand… It’s not her mind set. Over the course of my life, major adversities has come my way. Just like they do for all of us in different forms during your life. When I was a star athlete in high school I had to have surgery on both my knees. This took away a clear path to Division One sports for me. But, it put a chip on my shoulder. Giving me the drive to be the best I could be at whatever it is I am doing in life. I don’t take anything for granted. Because it could be taken from me in an instant. Alcoholism is something that runs rampant in my genes. This is an internal battle I face. Never letting it take me over… But, slipping to excessive drinking at times in my life, especially high school and college when the going got tuff. But, this internal struggle has shown me the power of positive thinking, conscious health and most of all willpower. Because focus and control over you and your surroundings drives one’s standards. The death of my father at a tender age
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Just do it!

Nothing holds her back from doing big things “Dad, Dad!!  Are you excited for hockey today?” Shanley (Shay) said at 8am on a Saturday morning as she jumped in our bed to give me a HUGE Hug. “YES!, honey I’m SUPER EXCITED to skate with you today.” I responded. “Me Too!!” Shanley said with a smile from ear to ear. This time of year, Saturday & Sunday mornings, Shay and I get to enjoy an hour on the ice together doing one of the sports we both love… Hockey! There is nothing like her smile when she wakes up and knows its hockey day.  Immediately, Shay jumps out of bed, rushes downstairs and starts packing her hockey bag. She can’t stop talking about shooting pucks, scoring a goal and practicing her stops… “Dad, don’t forget to tape my stick.” she yells up the stairs. “Dad, do you think we will get to play a game today… I’m going to score a GOAL!” she said to me as I knelt down next to her and helped pack her hockey bag. “Sugar Shay, are you sure you don’t want to get dressed at the house… instead of at the rink.” I asked. “No Dad, I am 6 now and I know how to get dressed like my sister Ireland and the big girls.” she responded. So, we packed up her hockey bag, her diabetes bag and grabbed something quick to eat. Then headed off for the rink. As we drove to the
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Star Student vs. Problem Child

Today, our public education system is broken as we know it. We know it’s broken and they know it’s broken. The real question… What are we going to do about it? Our current system is diluting the imaginative brilliance of our next generation. Sure, we can sit on the sidelines and tell ourselves, “Well, they are the teachers. They have masters degrees and PHD’s. They know what’s best for my child. Hell, I barely got through school.” Deep down inside, we all know it’s not working. We know this system is destroying the unique individual in each of our children. Like it did with so many of us. I believe, each child and each one of us have been given a unique gift. This gift is one we seek. Once found we feel obligated to use it as our tool to serve. It’s from our service we find purpose. Putting our children in schools with systems that treat each child as if they are all the same. Boxing them in, destroying any ability to find their gift at an early age. Taking away our children’s imaginative brilliance… a naive young mind has. How can we continue down this path. Sit here. Do this. Follow my directions. Do as I say, “I’m your teacher.” At a young age most children don’t know any different. Most children are taught to, “Do as I say.” Thinking for themselves… Is not allowed. Our school system today is one built on “A standardized approach.” A
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Strengthening The Chain of Inspiration

“Murph, your newsletter has inspired me to write something of my own.” The words of a good friend who was born to tell stories. On a Friday, sitting in my car, in front of a home I was tearing down for a new construction project we are working on… I get a call. It’s my good friend Charlie. A successful business owner who is always looking for ways to touch his employees and his friends. Charlie tells me, “Murph, we are going to start implementing a newsletter in our company. I love what you do in your newsletter. Can you help me?” My first reaction, “YES! — you know I am always here for you bro.” That’s when the conversation got really good. At least for me because I couldn’t stop talking. You see… When someone strikes a chord with me on something I really believe in. There is a chemical cocktail of dopamine, norepinephrine and serotonin that goes off in my brain. My energy level quadruples, I start pacing the room or when sitting my leg starts to bounce. My voice gets louder and passion permeates out of my soul. My first question, “Are you going to be real?” If you are not going to be real and let your audience deep inside Why, How or What you are all about. If you aren’t going to let them see the bad with the good. They will know. “They will know what Murph?” Charlie asked. They will know you are faking it.
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The Inspired Expression Of A Leader

Sitting across the table from Lou Nanne yesterday, as I spoke with him about life, a feeling I will never forget came over me. I was sitting in the booth where we were going to conduct our interview. Taking notes, writing down points I’m going to touch on for the story I wanted to tell. That’s when it happened, something profound struck me. Lou walked up to me, without me knowing… as I was focused on my message. He just stood there. At that very moment a feeling came over me. I can only explain it as an “Energy”. My chest felt heavy, my blood started rushing and adrenaline exploded within me. It’s a feeling I have had around very few people. Nervous… No, Excited… Yes!! But, still — it was something else… I stood up, like a lieutenant in the presence of a Military General. “Hello, Lou!” I said, as I put out my hand to shake his, in all due respect. He shook my hand and looked at me with a look I will never forget. It was a look that pierced deep into my soul. Lou was searching for my identity. The real me. It was at that very moment I knew our interview, this opportunity, was going to be something special. I knew, because his look reminded me of my grandfather. Like my grandfather Ken Murphy, an entrepreneur, who partnered with a good size printing supply company “Litho Supply Depot, Inc.” —  on its last $500 dollars before going
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Seeing The World Through Your Eyes…

Over the last several months I have realized more than ever just how perspective changes everything for each one of you I have conversation with. From the post I wrote about my buddy Charlie Lawson and his brother who suffered severe burns on his body. I received this message from Jenna Colvin: “Tim — I want to chat with you about this . His brother is the type of people firefighters for healing is all about helping …(the board I’m on) …. let’s chat”  www.FireFightersForHealing.com  The story I told in my April newsletter about my good friend Chris Cornelius and his amazing daughter who is battling cancer with a smile on her face. I received this message from Chad Schumacher:  “Murph, Loved the newsletter! I am on the board of a non-profit called Hope Kids. It’s an organization set up for children with life threatening illnesses. They try to offer events for kids and families every day to take their minds off of the treatment schedules and match up families with similar problems. Anyway, you should point her family in this direction………”  www.hopekids.org  My conversation with you on a weekly basis through my emails you continue reading and responding to. I received several responses like the ones from Tracy, Lorrie & Bob: “That’s a pretty cool story Tim. Keep changing lives! I recommended you to a girlfriend who’s divorcing — though not sure if she’ll sell or not. Definitely won’t use her previous agent she said…horrible. Told her about my experience with you and she was impressed.
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Everyone gets knocked down in life… The real test — getting up

Bam! She got hit in the mouth and went down… That’s what it felt like earlier this year when we found out our daughter, Ireland, made the “C” team for traveling softball. She worked so hard in the offseason to get better on her throwing, hitting and catching knowing tryouts were a big deal this season. We all kept rooting her on. Then, we got the news. This was the first time we had really been vested in sports and the process of tryouts and making a softball team. I’ll never forget those times when I was a kid. As a parent, it’s 10x more intense. You just want to get out there and do it for them. Ireland was devastated, tears started rolling down her cheek, she lost her breath as she started to gasp for air; then she started crying. As a parent this is the most helpless feeling you will ever have when it comes to parenting. The reality of competition just hit home. That’s when your fight or flight instinct kicks in. “Ireland, you don’t deserve this. You are better than this. There has to be some kind of mistake.” I said. Mom, coach and long time collegiate softball player herself, starts running through all of the players out loud. Trying to determine why Ireland landed on the “C” team. After hours of talking it through we both said to each other, “This is a mistake!” Then I thought to myself, Wow! this is so real.
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It’s moments like this That Remind You…
This Disease Is A Bitch!

Yesterday, I was golfing with a friend of mine and he asked me, “How are you doing Murph… Got any fun trips planned?” In an instant I thought about this trip I have been begging my wife to go on with me as a celebration of my 40th birthday. Very rarely do we get time alone together. Now a day’s… The only time we see each other is just before our heads hit the pillow. I look at her — she looks at me — and we say, “I’ll see you tomorrow.” Like two ships passing in the night. You know the other is there but, you’re both so focused on navigating the dark and the fog that you pass without a sound. I have been tracking flights to San Francisco. Man they are cheap. I saw one the other day for $250 per ticket round trip. I don’t fly a ton but, usually take 1–3 trips a year and I have never seen tickets this cheap. Man, I need to jump on these. So, I keep emailing her, let’s go, let’s make this happen, we deserve it, we need some alone time, etc…. Murph, I love you — you know that. I would love nothing more than to take this trip to San Francisco. I have always dreamed of being there with you, sipping wine, seeing the amazing sights and enjoying a romantic time with the guy I love more than anything.” BUT!!!! We don’t have anyone willing to take care of Shanley for more
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The Climb

4:30am, sitting here, I am lost in this picture as I put myself in their shoes. On the bottom of a mountain looking up and all I see is jagged rocks, big boulders (That could drop at anytime), cracks or traps as we like to call them — (Catch your foot or leg in one and potentially break it) get caught in one… it’s a potential setback. I can feel the struggle as their legs are burning. I can hear deep fast breathing as their lungs begin to burn and doubt creeps into their mind. “I don’t know if I can make it.” each one of them is saying. I am thinking to myself, “It’s times like these when you find out what you are really made of.” Looking up the mountain after every step… it seems as if you are not even moving, it seems like the top is getting farther and farther away. Upon each new plateau you realize there is another summit. All along the way you are thinking, “Why am I doing this. There has to be an easier way.” As I shut my eyes, a new vision enters my mind. It’s a picture of me: Sitting behind this computer writing to you. Struggling to find new guests for our podcast each and every week. Pushing hard to find new projects for our development company. Innovating new ways to grow EHRConstruction.com so we can help more families make their dreams come true. Helping friends who trust in us
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A Dream Come True – All You Must Do Is Believe In YOU…

“Murph, brother! It is so good to see you. Thanks for hooking up with me today!” words from my buddy Jason, that changed the course of both our lives, as we sat down for lunch one afternoon in 2006. Jason and I went way back to riding bikes and chasing girls in 6th grade. I lived in Burnsville and he lived in Apple Valley. We both went to Valley Middle school. Jason was a skater and trouble maker. I was a jock and always looking to push my boundaries. I think this was why we liked each other so much. Our friendship lasted all but one or two years as my athletics took up more and more time —  I found myself only hanging out with those whom I played sports. While Jason took a different path… But, I will never forget the times we had. Many years passed —  then I saw Jason at my 10 year high school reunion. I didn’t expect what I saw. I had heard stories about Jason and his struggles to make ends meet just out of high school. But, when I saw him at our 10 year reunion he was wearing a well manicured suite, black shoes that looked like a marine polished them, white shirt with not a single wrinkle, clean —  short — sharp hair cut (I always remembered him with long hair) and he looked lean and healthy. I couldn’t help but walk up to him as I needed to know his story. Come to
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